


L’homme est un Chat

by ThunderCant



Category: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse)
Genre: Ada the cat lover, Animal Transformation, Cats, F/M, Present Tense, Rating for later chapter, a whole lot of shameless fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:21:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23705305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThunderCant/pseuds/ThunderCant
Summary: A mad scientist and a spy have an interesting evening after an experiment gone wrong.
Relationships: Albert Wesker/Ada Wong
Comments: 4
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Wesker has a really high-pitched and poorly fitting meow, when he isn't doing the teddy cat honk

Sometimes, Ada thinks her boss does things for the attention. Sure, he pretends to be some sort of apex predator (though, personally, she thinks he’s more of a weapon) but if he’s any predator, it’s definitely one of those big cats. Dangerous, but easily mislead with catnip.

Literally, in this case. She’s waiting for him to finish up one of his latest ideas when she hears the shattering glass and distant shout-turned-cough. A sharp spike of fear cuts through her before she grabs her gun. With Wesker, it could be anything- viruses, mould, parasites- but anything did usually die with enough bullets.

She reaches the lab in record time. There’s no sharp black shape through the looking glass. There is, however, a rounded pile of black shapes on the floor. Moving.

“I swear to god,” she mutters, tapping in the code and entering, “if you’re dead because one of your own experiments ate you inside out…”

She doesn’t finish the thought, because the shape moves. And hisses. She takes aim.

“Meow!”

She pauses. The shape wriggles and squirms, until it finally manages to poke out a little gold head, crowned with enormous ears and shiny, red, eyes. Her jaw drops, safety back on her gun, and she crouches. 

“...Wesker?” 

The cat turns to face her, and immediately starts mewling up a storm. They aren’t even loud enough to echo. She’s not sure she would notice, given that probably-Wesker is flapping his weirdly-long cat arms around, dainty pink jelly beans spread wide, claws out. His pupils are all blown out too. He is every inch a cat, yet somehow, still so much himself that it’s kind of funny.

She can’t help giggling. Wesker fixes her with the most offended stare a cat can manage.

“It is you, right?”

“...Mraow…”

He wiggles out of his clothes, ears pinned back while he creeps closer to her. He’s long and sleek, just like he should be, and gangly as all hell, which is also what he looks like after he’s well-fucked and sprawled out on top of her. His little pink nose twitches when he sniffs her held out hand, before rubbing his face into her fingers, and freezing. She chuckles and gives his chin a tickle. He starts vibrating immediately. 

“Oh Albert, I don’t know what you were doing, but if this is the result I’ll slip it into every water system in the world. You’re so cute.” 

He startles away and starts meowing again. He looks horribly insulted with his tail puffed out and lip curled, just like he does as a person. As a person it’s intimidating, as a cat, it’s the most adorable thing she’s ever seen. 

“I imagine that if I go ‘pspsps’ at you, you’ll bite me, won’t you?”

“Mew!”

“I thought so. Can you come here anyway? I don’t know what’s going through your cat-brain at the moment, but you do have a charming purr.”

Wesker turns his head up and sniffs. Typical. Even when he’s stuck as a cat through his own hubris (alright, she doesn’t know that it was his arrogance that caused Wesker’s cattification, but usually when something goes wrong it’s his fault) he still manages to be a snooty asshole.

So in other words, perfect cat. She’ll have to try a different tactic. 

“Well, I’m going back to the couch in the office. No one else will be here until morning. So unless you’d like to stay in your nest..?”

Wesker looks back at his clothes. There’s bits of glass scattered on the floor. Ada’s not going to clean that up, so if Wesker wants to be stubborn, he’ll be stubborn and surrounded by sharp things. 

Sure enough, he hops out of the pile. He also lands on a shard, and yelps. A few pinpricks of blood scatter on the otherwise clean tile. Wesker stares at his paw like it’s betrayed him- then again, if he can usually recover in seconds, it probably had. Ada clicks her tongue, hoping it sounds reassuring rather than condescending.

“C’mere Albert, I’ll get it out. It’s just glass. I’ll even throw it in the right bin this time.” 

“Mew…” 

He hobbles over, looking grumpy and sort of pathetic. She lifts under his legs, scooping him up so he can rest his head on her chest. He doesn’t look any less mad, but he starts purring right away.

“No kneading until the blood’s gone, okay? I know you’re a breast guy, but this shirt was expensive, and I’m not above committing fraud to replace it.”

Wesker just keeps purring, apparently content with that, while she walks him over to the sink. His wound will heal as soon as the glass is gone, but the blood’s still there. There will be no progenitor infection today, thank you very much. 

She sets him down and finds tweezers to pull out the large shard, tossing it into the sharp hazards bin and watching the wound close. Wesker immediately tries to lick it.

“Hey! You don’t do that as a person, do you?”

He stares. He continues to lick.

“Gross. Are you coming to the couch?”

“Mraow!” 

He doesn’t move though. He stares at her, expectantly, his tail flicking and ears up. 

“...You are the laziest man I’ve ever met, Albert. Either the laziest, or the one that takes advantage the most,” Ada holds her arms out, huffing a little when she gets a chest full of cat, “alright, get your fill. You’re so needy.”

“Prrrr.”

“Yes, yes, you better keep purring. You are a very cute cat.”

“Prrr.”

Typical Wesker. He’ll never admit it, but Ada knows better; a good compliment or wowed expression is enough to make him preen. He’s getting cat hair all over her clothes and the worst part is, he’s probably going to get away with it.

She sits on the couch with a huff. Wesker keeps purring, rubbing his face wherever he can reach, tickling the strips of skin on her side with his whiskers. She adjusts so she can hold him with one arm and sets about making him purr harder. His ears are silky-soft, just like the little hairs at the back of his neck, where the gel doesn’t reach. She trails her hand down the bumps of his spine and over his tail, watching the fur slip out of her grasp as it flicks and flips. She dares a hand on his belly, and gets a growl.

“Okay, no belly rubs. Ears again?”

“Mew.”

“I wish I had a kitty,” Ada says, a little wistful, “with the business we’re in, it’d be nice to have someone with easy loyalties, don’t you think?”

“Raow.”

“I know, I know, Leon’s predictable. But there’s always a chance he’s going to shoot me one day, if I do something too morally reprehensible. Cats are sweet. Cats just want food and love.” Wesker blinks at her. “Alright, some cats also want world domination. Like the one I have in my lap.”

Like a bear-trap, Wesker grabs her hand and nips her fingers, sharp points digging into her arm, “Alright, alright, not world domination! Jeez,” she puffs as his sandpaper tongue runs over the bites, “it’s not my fault you’re transparent as a pile of mud, Albert. 

“Rrrrow…”

“Yeah, that probably does go back to the loyalties thing, huh. I trust you about as far as I can throw you, you trust me...probably less than you can throw me, huh. I’ve seen you toss people around. If you ever abandon weapons development, you will be an excellent pitcher.” 

He preens at that, before guiding her hand back to his oversized ears, gentle rumbles returning. If Ada goes into world domination and supervillainy, she’s definitely going to find a way to replicate the cattification. Wesker would be an excellent lap-cat.

His eyes slide shut as she keeps petting him, gradually going slack in her hold. He’s such a long cat, but he’s so light she could easily cart him around in a handbag. 

Ada plinks one of his paws. Nothing. 

Wesker’s fast asleep. Still gently purring, with his head on her chest and his little pink toes relaxed, nose twitching now and then. So much for not trusting her. 

Then again, he does still have his progenitor. He could probably make an escape if she decides to pull something, cat or no, and then she’d have a very angry Wesker on her tail. 

There’s too many mind-games when it comes to long-term partners. It makes her think of Leon and his sweet face, always terribly hurt when she values her job just a bit more than him. She already has one long-term pain, she doesn’t need another one.

“You’re very lucky you’re useful,” she whispers, tickling the twist of fur on his throat, “otherwise…”

Well, that’s for another day. That’s just their business, a friend is a foe waiting to happen. For now, they’re friends. Tomorrow, Wesker might have her killed for seeing him so vulnerable, and Ada might trap him in isolation and sell him to the highest bidder. 

But that’s tomorrow. Tomorrow is a long way away.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Was meant to be shameless porn but somehow turned into whatever this is

Ada doesn’t wake to the pleasant weight of a snoozing cat. One may say she wakes because the weight is no longer pleasant; for all that Wesker is quite a light man, given his size, he’s still _heavy_.

“Wesker,” she puffs, “Wesker, get _off_.”

He does not get off. He doesn’t do anything. He just stays where he is, half-on her lap and half-on her chest, naked as the day he was born, with his face twitching occasionally. It’s an unwelcome sight even when she knows why he’s there; a fun lay he may be, but it’s rare that it makes up for the sheer _clinginess_ that comes with a rare overnight stay.

Christ, she needs better taste in men. Wesker’s head lolls onto her shoulder, and she feels drool.

“Ew!”

“Mrrrr…”

“Oh don’t you do that now, you are not a cat anymore! This isn’t cute!”

He somehow rests more of his weight on her, tipping her over until she’s flat on her back, him splayed out on top of her, and his gangly arms curling around her neck. If she were a psychiatrist, she might think it was some sort of cry for help, a ‘love me’ shouted desperately into the night. She’s not a psychiatrist, though, so she puts it down to his stupid idiot bastard brain moving towards heat like a lizard on a rock.

Of course, it could be the remnants of whatever he did to himself in the lab. He still has the big cat ears, silky soft on her neck. They just don’t make up for the drool.

She huffs. Stupid Wesker and his stupid experiments. She should have left him in his lab to turn back.

 _At least he’s cute,_ says the traitorous voice that makes her do stupid things like stay the night and spare government agents, _and you can pet those ears._

That part she does agree with. The ears grew to match his real body. She feels them flick when she settles a hand on the base of one, scratching the ungelled hair and rubbing over the thin skin. He can’t purr anymore, she thinks, but he mumbles something, and that’s close enough.

He also moans. Like a shark smelling blood, Ada attacks. Slowly dragging the tip of her finger around the base before creeping up to tickle the small tufts of hair at the ends of his ears. Another moan escapes, his breath hot and wanting. She feels his hips shift, nudging her leg.

Isn’t that an interesting development?

“Oh Albert…” She sighs, moving one of her hands to roll them both over, nudging her knee between his legs. He’s already half hard, and the new pressure makes him whine. She can’t help smirking. Pressing her lips to his neck and starting to mouth against it, coaxing more moans and grunts while he ruts against her, just like a cat in heat. She can’t resist doing more, sliding her free hand over his chest, his stomach, following the cords of his muscles to pinch his ass. He still doesn’t wake up. How sweet.

She wonders how far she can push it before he flashes those devil eyes at her.

With spit-slicked fingers, she dips between his cheeks. He gasps against her neck when she slides inside him, slow and careful.

“You’re such a baby,” she whispers, “I’ve done worse to you.”

Ada punctuates it with a curl of her fingers and pinch to his ears, finally making him cry out proper, arms crushing tight around her.

“Mrow…”

They both freeze.

“...Albert.”

“...Mew…”

She can’t see his face, but if he isn’t bright red she’ll eat her own socks. Looks like the ears aren’t the only thing to stay.

“...That’s really cute.”

“Meow…”

If he was mad, he probably would have done something to her. So she keeps going. She thrusts her fingers in time with his rolling hips, suckling his neck to coax out more of those darling mewls, playing him like an instrument.

“Mew!”

“Come on kitty, purr for me.”

“M-mrah!”

It’s definitely not the most explosive time they’ve had together, but he comes, regardless. His dick spits white onto her leg before the tension ebbs out of him, leaving his full weight to rest against her side. As always, he slides down, face pressed into her chest.

“You’re needy, do you know that?”

“…Prrr…”

“You really know what buttons to press too. At least let me get stuff off my leg.”

Wesker doesn’t move. She snorts.

“I’ll knee you in the dick.”

That earns her a glare.

“And I won’t scratch your ears.”

 _That_ make him move, even if he pouts and stares the whole time she is gone. Typical. Still, tissues were used, shirts removed and a spare throw found. She edges herself back onto his office couch, chest full of purring man, and throws the plush not-blanket over them both. She’s just about to start dozing when he grabs her hand and moves it back onto his head. Right. Ears.

Silky soft and warm beneath her fingers, exactly unlike her boss.

She hopes they don’t ever go away.

(And maybe she hopes she’ll find what turned him into a cat in the first place. World domination with Weskitty sounds more appealing by the minute. Doubly so if she can somehow get a Leon puppy out of it.)


End file.
